To Pierre

I'm assuming if youre reading this letter you were not ready to talk to me today. All i really want to know is your perspective on the night we split up and the reason to why you choose to keep us separated.

I can take any answer by now since my heart has already been broken to millions of pieces. it really doesnt take more than 1 week to get over our misunderstanding fight. it was a misunderstanding. it's okay to say that you dont love me anymore, at least it's a valid reason. perhaps you dont see me in your future, fair enough. any reason is better than hearing nothing at all.

is it because you kept your bargain by going to church? our deal was you take me to the gym and properly show me what i need to work on. be there beside me for a week until im use to the routine. sex... after going to st. lorenzo, ive realize that birth control pills are necessary. and that you picked the wrong month to leave, as soon as i was done with my period, i was the horniest girl on the planet. ever thought about kissing my lips before wanting to have sex. i get a warm sensation in my body and it make me want to have more sex with you. next time, stop busting out your penis out of nowhere, stop fingering me and kissing my boobs. first try kissing my lips, you'll get more out of me if i feel like youre thinking with your heart instead of your penis.

i'm just soo disappointed in you. i swear the one thing you taught me in our relationship was communication, and you failed at it. i cant believe its taking you longer than 2 weeks to want to talk.

i have to say, you have changed, at least towards me. i can handle change, it takes time, but im willing to learn and grow and adapt.

unfortunately for us, i cant handle wasting away another 4 months of our lives. i'm going to give you until oct. 31st to talk to me. after that, im going to assume that you are fine without me and i will peacefully drift away from us. i dont want to be 25 and completely stuck on you. i know in my heart we are good for each other, if you dont see that then you dont. I cant make you feel something if you feel in your heart we dont belong... whatever you do dont make me wait until the end of the month.

i probably have more things to say, but i'll leave it for when you want to talk.

love
steph